What We Don’t See: Designing for Learners in Real Life
There was a time when a traumatic event shook my family’s foundation. Unexpectedly, I had to work two jobs to support myself and my two young children. Homework time, in theory, should’ve been a chance for me to help them learn, but in reality, it just wasn’t possible. They were too young to work independently, and I was too stretched to step in. It was one of many moments that helped me understand: learning doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Whether a classroom is virtual, face-to-face or completely asynchronous, life outside a course is always present—and for some learners, it’s heavy.
Some learners are dealing with health issues, including mental health. Some are navigating unsafe home environments or caring for younger siblings. Some are trying to learn while living in poverty. As educators and instructional designers, we may never know what someone is carrying when they show up to learn or when they can’t show up at all. But we can build our spaces to honor that truth. We can offer flexible options so learners can engage when they’re mentally ready. We can design low-stakes activities that reduce performance anxiety and affirm that mistakes are part of learning, not proof of failure. And we can normalize the ebbs and flows in participation that come with being human.
When my kids couldn’t complete their homework, I used to feel a sharp sting of guilt, as though my parenting was on trial. But over time, I realized perfection wasn’t the goal—resilience, growth, and presence were. That same lesson applies to learning design. Not every learner will reach the same outcome, on the same timeline, in the same way. And that’s okay. Redefining success means making space for people to show up however they can.
Living, working and learning while recovering from trauma taught me and my children what success sometimes looks like: not an A+, but just logging in, exploring some content, or asking for help. That perspective now lives in my work. I use multimodal content—videos, audio, reading, visuals—so learners can engage in a way that suits their needs and energy. I let my learners choose how to express what they’ve learned: a video note, a voice recording, a written reflection. That agency matters, especially when, for some learners, so many other aspects of their lives may feel out of their control. When possible, I include resilience-building topics or examples in the content itself, like overcoming adversity or self-advocacy.
Some traumatic circumstances, like the one that affected my family, eventually fade. Others will accompany learners for the length of their education or their lives. But compassion in design isn’t about solving trauma; it’s about softening its edge. It’s about building spaces where learners feel seen, supported, and safe enough to grow. And that kind of learning—the kind that holds space for being human—is the kind that truly lasts.
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